by Aurora Stoltz
“Gifted kid burnout.” Whether you know the term from Twitter memes, from your own experiences, or have never heard this term before in your life, it’s important to talk about. A gifted kid burnout is a kid who was previously labeled as gifted by their parents and teachers, but now finds themselves completely burnt out, paralyzed by their own potential. These are kids that should be CEO’s or presidents, but instead end up sad cashiers or pencil pushers. Often times they are found lacking motivation and general skill in anything necessary at all to their daily life. Is this phenomenon due to disillusions instilled in young kids, given too much praise and too many participation trophies? Is it simply another short-coming of our one-size-fits-all education system? Or is there something deeper at play here?
The gifted kid experience starts like this: you’re put into a quiet room, maybe the library or some unused music room with the rest of your second grade class. They tell you to take a test, and you do. It’s full of weird, boring questions about shapes and reading comprehension, all the while this little multicolored logo that says “GATE” in big cheery letters grins down at you from the corner of the screen. The minutes pass by easily, and soon it’s time for recess. You go about your day and forget about the test, at least until the next week. Then, the teacher pulls you aside to let you know that you scored very highly on that test. You’re gifted, and you’re being offered a unique, advanced learning experience.
This is when it really starts: the onslaught of compliments - “you’re so mature for your age” or “you’re an old soul” or any manner of things adults say, encouraging yet condescending. Time passes like this, easy tests, ones you don’t have to study for, straight A’s, and endless affirmations that you’re destined for great things. But then something happens. Sometimes it’s a flunked class, or a botched test, and then somewhere along the way, the realization that, maybe, you’re not all that. Sometimes this so called gifted-ness simply fizzles out; the kid who was at a seventh grade reading level at first grade is average by eighth. Other times it’s a failure to adapt to an environment like college or high school that requires actual work to master a task.
This realization can be jarring, especially after a childhood so full of praise. Many gifted kids build their identity on their “gifted-ness” and when their “gifted-ness” runs out, or no longer has any relevance to their daily lives, these kids can end up feeling lost and without an identity to run back to. Everything they thought they were was false, so now what?
Most burnt out gifted kids end up as underachieving adults; tired twenty somethings spending their days scrolling dead-eyed through Twitter and shuffling through the mundane perils of adulthood unenthusiastically and without hope. Often times they turn to forms of escapism, sometimes including substance abuse. It’s no surprise that previously gifted kids grow up to suffer from forms of depression and anxiety. But are these people products of the label “gifted” or are they simply a community within the larger community of young adults grappling with their mental health?
It is important to note that these burnt out gifted kids are self identified. The term traces back to a contextually viral meme posted by instagram user @angstyfairy in 2017, but the very fact that it was able to go viral means that people felt like burnt out gifted kids long before they saw the post. However, aside from a few articles from The Outline and Bustle, there isn’t really much literature looking into this issue. The most we can know about this phenomenon is from our personal experiences and a few memes online. And although it seems like a few light-hearted, possibly self deprecating jokes, there is real suffering in the life of a burnt out gifted kid.
Whether this issue stems from, be it another symptom of mental illness, an overinflated ego popping at the first prick of the “real world,” or just a simple “burning out.” we as a community don’t know yet. Is it a new problem, unique to internet raised generations? Or is it yet another shortcoming of our struggling education system? What the true source of this issue is, well, no one really knows yet.
What we do know is this is a real issue. Whether you know someone who feels this way, or you do yourself, it’s important to note that this feeling won’t last. Past achievements don’t define you, and neither do present failures. In fact, being in a sort of rut, or what feels like a downward slope, is really just a small blip in your life. Imposter syndrome can be uncomfortable, sure, but not terminal, not if you let it be. Don’t let yourself or your friends be haunted by each little failure. It’s not that you’re not living up to your past potential, or that the standards people hold you up to are a mirage. It’s just that you’re growing up and things are changing. You’re not going to get a pat on the back for everything you do, but you’re also not going to become suddenly worthless because of one bad grade.
“Gifted kid burnout” is a name for a feeling, not an identity. It will fade. You will grow out of this, like the old “gifted” label, and you will grow into something better. You will grow into you.
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